Marc and Tod review responses to a fake Craigslist personal ad Marc posted as 'Crystal,' a playful girl seeking men who can write haikus. The hosts critique the applicants' poetry, grammar, and personalities before crowning a winner.
Marc returns from a Thanksgiving trip to Iowa and shares his experiences with the hosts. The episode culminates in a structured 'Rate The State' segment where Marc scores Iowa across five specific categories.
The hosts celebrate Thanksgiving by attempting to deep-fry a massive 48-pound turkey that John Salwin won at an Ice Cube charity event in Watts. The episode features a guest intern from USC and ends in a chaotic accident during the frying process.
The hosts discuss their upcoming Thanksgiving travel plans, including Tod's trip to Iowa and John's trip to Tucson. The conversation devolves into a series of riffs on airport security, 'hack' comedy, and a graphic debate about anatomy and dating mothers.
The hosts discuss Thanksgiving traditions, specifically the placement of stuffing in a turkey, before diving into a listener mailbag. The episode features discussions on aggressive pickup lines in South Korea, real doll pornography, and the 2012 Mayan apocalypse conspiracy.